http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_E-P_m3sUg
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Monday, April 21, 2008
Monday, January 21, 2008
So I should be in bed...
seeing that I have a large program tomorrow (or today now) all day. But I had to come on. I was kind of inspired by Jamaal and Ray as I see they have recently post. Although I don't really know if people really read this since I wasn't consistent last year. But 2008 is very very different.
A lot has happened, but quick run down:
-end of 2007 was the joint choir concert at State Theater, Nikki Giovanni at IC, Car crap, Christmas, the permanent position at IC, and a whole bunch of stuff I vow to leave in 2007.
I THANK GOD FOR IT
-2008 has brought about MC Lyte at IC (thats the program for MLK Day tomorrow), The Year of New Beginnings & Victory sermons at church (much needed), liberation from a issue I've had for almost 10 years (notice the word ALMOST...God is good), me actually working out again and really being devoted to this thing called weight loss, and me actually finding (or re-discovering) the woman I am supposed to be with for the rest of my life.
Yes folks, look like John might be wifed up soon...who woulda thunk it? lol...More on that soon enough.
Without going into the details that most people want to hear, I could literally ball for days, thanking God for deliverance. God said He would never put too much for you to bear. I used to think I wouldn't be able to bear it, which would have taken my life in a downward spiral, honestly. This thing had the tightest grip on me that no one couldn't see...not even me. I just love God for his healing power. Enough said.
There is so much to talk about, but I need to go to bed for real, lol. Pushups, then bed. More blogging later...and more consistently.
God bless.
----------------
Now playing: Floetry - Sometimes U Make Me Smile
via FoxyTunes
A lot has happened, but quick run down:
-end of 2007 was the joint choir concert at State Theater, Nikki Giovanni at IC, Car crap, Christmas, the permanent position at IC, and a whole bunch of stuff I vow to leave in 2007.
I THANK GOD FOR IT
-2008 has brought about MC Lyte at IC (thats the program for MLK Day tomorrow), The Year of New Beginnings & Victory sermons at church (much needed), liberation from a issue I've had for almost 10 years (notice the word ALMOST...God is good), me actually working out again and really being devoted to this thing called weight loss, and me actually finding (or re-discovering) the woman I am supposed to be with for the rest of my life.
Yes folks, look like John might be wifed up soon...who woulda thunk it? lol...More on that soon enough.
Without going into the details that most people want to hear, I could literally ball for days, thanking God for deliverance. God said He would never put too much for you to bear. I used to think I wouldn't be able to bear it, which would have taken my life in a downward spiral, honestly. This thing had the tightest grip on me that no one couldn't see...not even me. I just love God for his healing power. Enough said.
There is so much to talk about, but I need to go to bed for real, lol. Pushups, then bed. More blogging later...and more consistently.
God bless.
----------------
Now playing: Floetry - Sometimes U Make Me Smile
via FoxyTunes
Monday, December 17, 2007
God's Will...Not My Will...
These thoughts might be all over the place, but stay with me, lol...
For the past 3 weeks, I have been having some serious thoughts about many of the things that have been happening to me, both good and not so great. Through all the smiles and the victories, this has been a trying time for me. Not so much that I want to give up. I haven't completely been on the verge of tears or anything. But I recognize that there is something that God wants to do in my life. There is a place where God wants me to go for something only God can ask me to do. However, while my prayer has been for God to have His way and to guide me, I continue to try steering my own path.
As humans, we say that we trust God for everything, but then try to take every matter into our own hands. We have to understand that there are things that He will make the provisions for us to do, but only when we have given Him total control. Until we can begin to give Him full control of our life, He cannot reveal to us all that He has for us. We are hindering ourselves from the destiny God has called us to.
We must also realize that our path, while it may seem easier, will only get us stuck in uncertain situations and stray us from where God has called us. As cliche as it sounds, understand that every situation that you go through is for a reason. There might be a situation that God put you in. Be comforted in the fact that He will being you out. And in those situations that the emeny has created for you, know that God will bring you out of those as well. I encourage you to put more trust in God right now and you will begin to see things change.
This note wasn't just for you...this was a reminder and sermon to myself...
----------------
Now playing: Ricky Dillard - Our Father You Are Holy
via FoxyTunes
For the past 3 weeks, I have been having some serious thoughts about many of the things that have been happening to me, both good and not so great. Through all the smiles and the victories, this has been a trying time for me. Not so much that I want to give up. I haven't completely been on the verge of tears or anything. But I recognize that there is something that God wants to do in my life. There is a place where God wants me to go for something only God can ask me to do. However, while my prayer has been for God to have His way and to guide me, I continue to try steering my own path.
As humans, we say that we trust God for everything, but then try to take every matter into our own hands. We have to understand that there are things that He will make the provisions for us to do, but only when we have given Him total control. Until we can begin to give Him full control of our life, He cannot reveal to us all that He has for us. We are hindering ourselves from the destiny God has called us to.
We must also realize that our path, while it may seem easier, will only get us stuck in uncertain situations and stray us from where God has called us. As cliche as it sounds, understand that every situation that you go through is for a reason. There might be a situation that God put you in. Be comforted in the fact that He will being you out. And in those situations that the emeny has created for you, know that God will bring you out of those as well. I encourage you to put more trust in God right now and you will begin to see things change.
This note wasn't just for you...this was a reminder and sermon to myself...
----------------
Now playing: Ricky Dillard - Our Father You Are Holy
via FoxyTunes
Friday, October 26, 2007
just trying to keep up
So I have been traveling alot this month. Most of it was for work, some of it was for personal time at home for my birthday. In any case, I'm going out of town again in about an hour and change, so I just wanted to say hi to the blogging community, lol. Next week's blog(s) will be full of stuff, so tune in!
-J
-J
Sunday, September 30, 2007
No title...just thoughts...
There are just so many things I think I want to get off my chest, so I think I will...
Some of these are specific...others are vague...just roll with it:
-As a nation, we have got to be more active responsive in these acts against humanity and specifically against Black people. In some ways, we are becoming immune to racism and prejudice. That really scares me.
-Pray for whatever that thing is that is holding me back from the places God wants me to go. It has got to let go of me...it can't hold me down any longer.
-I miss my friends sooo much right now. In particular, I have to say that I miss my brothers. Having black males as friends in my earlier school days was hard to come by. These guys are not only family to me, but they helped me to find out who me is. Granted, I will see most of them this weekend, I miss seeing them everyday and I hope they know that.
-I need to spend more time in God's word.
-I need to stop sinning intentionally...I know that God is easy to forgive and slow to judge, but some of the things I do are thought out and I shouldn't be doing that.
-Work is SOOOO the bomb right now! No regrets!
-Life outside of work is frustrating...so much to do, but no time to do it.
-I could use a good cry...honestly.
-I plan on giving people their flowers before they are gone...I think we should make more of an effort to do that in our lives.
So random...oh well...off my chest and to the blog...
Some of these are specific...others are vague...just roll with it:
-As a nation, we have got to be more active responsive in these acts against humanity and specifically against Black people. In some ways, we are becoming immune to racism and prejudice. That really scares me.
-Pray for whatever that thing is that is holding me back from the places God wants me to go. It has got to let go of me...it can't hold me down any longer.
-I miss my friends sooo much right now. In particular, I have to say that I miss my brothers. Having black males as friends in my earlier school days was hard to come by. These guys are not only family to me, but they helped me to find out who me is. Granted, I will see most of them this weekend, I miss seeing them everyday and I hope they know that.
-I need to spend more time in God's word.
-I need to stop sinning intentionally...I know that God is easy to forgive and slow to judge, but some of the things I do are thought out and I shouldn't be doing that.
-Work is SOOOO the bomb right now! No regrets!
-Life outside of work is frustrating...so much to do, but no time to do it.
-I could use a good cry...honestly.
-I plan on giving people their flowers before they are gone...I think we should make more of an effort to do that in our lives.
So random...oh well...off my chest and to the blog...
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
I Want It All Back!
This post is less about me and more of a reflection and testimony, so bear with me.
Some people know that in the fall of 2005, I went through a serious depression. It was my senior year at Cornell and I fell into the biggest slump I have EVER hit. I couldn't even really believe it myself. I saw myself get mad, extremely sad, frustrated with life, everything. That time of my life, I was the most antisocial of my life. I'd lock myself in my room and do nothing but stare at my computer or the ceiling. It was a terrible time. What had to be the worst part of it all was that I had nothing in my life that was going so wrong that I needed to be in this state. I couldn't pinpoint anything that was specifically making me feel that way.
I even remember one night where Jamaal and Paul, two of my brothers, came to my room to chill and try to cheer me up and I acted like a jerk. I wouldn't even really look at them. I found myself angry...not at them, but at myself. I don't think they knew how to respond, but honestly, I wouldn't have either. I thank God for friends like them, who didn't give up on me.
I say all of this because recently I have experienced a number of people who seem to be walking around broken. I have talked to people who sound like all is lost and that nothing good will ever come of any situation. What I am seeing is the same thing that I saw after my depression...
I left Satan take my joy, hope, and victory from me.
Now, please do not think I am about to preach. I don't preach, nor do I claim to be one...trust, lol. But I do want people to realize that you cannot let the devil get the best of you. Satan attacks the hardest when God is trying to do something and when you are too. Don't give him the victory...take it back.
Tye Tribbett and G.A. said it best...Victory Live, listen to track 2...and do me a favor...Go Get Your Stuff Back!
need some help getting it? here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QW1QN0S8koU
Some people know that in the fall of 2005, I went through a serious depression. It was my senior year at Cornell and I fell into the biggest slump I have EVER hit. I couldn't even really believe it myself. I saw myself get mad, extremely sad, frustrated with life, everything. That time of my life, I was the most antisocial of my life. I'd lock myself in my room and do nothing but stare at my computer or the ceiling. It was a terrible time. What had to be the worst part of it all was that I had nothing in my life that was going so wrong that I needed to be in this state. I couldn't pinpoint anything that was specifically making me feel that way.
I even remember one night where Jamaal and Paul, two of my brothers, came to my room to chill and try to cheer me up and I acted like a jerk. I wouldn't even really look at them. I found myself angry...not at them, but at myself. I don't think they knew how to respond, but honestly, I wouldn't have either. I thank God for friends like them, who didn't give up on me.
I say all of this because recently I have experienced a number of people who seem to be walking around broken. I have talked to people who sound like all is lost and that nothing good will ever come of any situation. What I am seeing is the same thing that I saw after my depression...
I left Satan take my joy, hope, and victory from me.
Now, please do not think I am about to preach. I don't preach, nor do I claim to be one...trust, lol. But I do want people to realize that you cannot let the devil get the best of you. Satan attacks the hardest when God is trying to do something and when you are too. Don't give him the victory...take it back.
Tye Tribbett and G.A. said it best...Victory Live, listen to track 2...and do me a favor...Go Get Your Stuff Back!
need some help getting it? here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QW1QN0S8koU
Sunday, September 9, 2007
Complicated/Randomness...
I have a feeling that people are making things more complicated than they are.
I am not responding to a particular person or incident, nor is this an angry post, lol. I am just interested in why things today seem to be so much more difficult than they were before (even as little as less than a year ago). I have experienced confusion, arguments, major disagreements, and all out craziness for the mere fact that people are making things much bigger than they are. Why not keep the issue the small thing that it was? Wouldn't that make it easier to handle? Making it big only makes it more of an issue, ya dig? I guess that I could be making a big deal of this thought, lol. But I'm not. It's just funny to me. However, my life continues to roll on...
(That was MAD RANDOM, but I had to put that out in the air...)
Things have been going well. Life is good, God is greater. I have done so much in the past couple of days, I cannot even recall it all, lol. Oh well, this is the time where that can happen. I'm young, so its cool. But while I did a lot, I also didn't do much. Confused? Well, this week was the first time where I actually stayed in my apartment from after work until the next morning. I didn't go out to check on underclassmen, didn't go to a program, I just stayed in my apartment and occupied myself that way. And this time, it felt good. It used to feel weird. But I know that God is telling me to slow down. Of course, I don't understand why, but I know that God's plan is perfect, so I just do what He says.
Finally, I have to give a great big shout out to my BSP family. One of these days, I will reveal what BSP is. But for now, know that my BSP family is the best and I miss them so much. All of them are doing major things (big things are of the past, haha) and beginning to make their marks. Keep praying for me as I do for yall. I love you. Peace.
I am not responding to a particular person or incident, nor is this an angry post, lol. I am just interested in why things today seem to be so much more difficult than they were before (even as little as less than a year ago). I have experienced confusion, arguments, major disagreements, and all out craziness for the mere fact that people are making things much bigger than they are. Why not keep the issue the small thing that it was? Wouldn't that make it easier to handle? Making it big only makes it more of an issue, ya dig? I guess that I could be making a big deal of this thought, lol. But I'm not. It's just funny to me. However, my life continues to roll on...
(That was MAD RANDOM, but I had to put that out in the air...)
Things have been going well. Life is good, God is greater. I have done so much in the past couple of days, I cannot even recall it all, lol. Oh well, this is the time where that can happen. I'm young, so its cool. But while I did a lot, I also didn't do much. Confused? Well, this week was the first time where I actually stayed in my apartment from after work until the next morning. I didn't go out to check on underclassmen, didn't go to a program, I just stayed in my apartment and occupied myself that way. And this time, it felt good. It used to feel weird. But I know that God is telling me to slow down. Of course, I don't understand why, but I know that God's plan is perfect, so I just do what He says.
Finally, I have to give a great big shout out to my BSP family. One of these days, I will reveal what BSP is. But for now, know that my BSP family is the best and I miss them so much. All of them are doing major things (big things are of the past, haha) and beginning to make their marks. Keep praying for me as I do for yall. I love you. Peace.
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